I am deeply honored to have led the memorial service for my dear friend and long lost sister, Laura Whites. Her death was sudden and came as a complete shock. I don’t know if I will ever fully process losing her. Laura was such loving, caring, sincere, and protective friend. No one will ever replace her. I miss her beyond words.

The service was held at NOLA Aikido on the evening of Tuesday, March 3, 2026. Below is the transcript of the what I shared at the dojo to venerate Laura.

Thank you all for gathering together to celebrate the compassionate and joyous life of our beloved Laura Ann Whites Sensei. As many of you know, we usually hold the women’s class during this hour on Tuesdays, which is not only a class Laura led, but a class she started and nurtured for many years. Tonight, we have instead dedicated this time and space that was special to Laura to her memorial service. 

The service will begin with the ringing of the bell to symbolize our invitation to offer Laura our collective love. This will be followed by moments of silence to venerate her. I will open the floor to share memories of Laura’s life and legacy. You are welcome to follow and ring the bell when you come up to share words about Laura. 

Also, please do take care of yourself as you need to. The restroom is around the corner next to the hall and there is water in the back. If you need air, you can open the back door and sit on the bench. Laura would want you to do what is needed for you to feel present and cared for. 

A Eulogy for Our Beloved Laura

Laura used to tell me we were long lost sisters, and I believe we are. And it is Laura’s warm and inviting voice that I remember most of all about her. Every time I entered the women’s dressing room here at NOLA Aikido, she would heartfully say, “Jaime, I am so glad you’re here.” I felt the same immense joy when seeing her. I can still hear her tell me that when I arrive. And I feel the same glee, though now through tears of grief, about feeling her loving presence now. 

During my first couple of years here, Laura and I were the only women consistently attending practice. Now, there are so many women who practice at NOLA Aikido, who return and are more consistent than I am able to be these days! This growth delighted Laura so very much. Holding space for the women’s class and cultivating a welcoming environment for women, and everyone, are beautiful gifts that Laura made possible for us all through her relentless work to embed standards that are now second nature to our dojo community. Whether you know it or not, Laura’s voice permeates throughout all of our practice.

I know I am not supposed to admit this, but Laura was my absolute favorite person to practice Aikido with. So often we would connect and synchronize without ever saying a word. Paired rolling and falling were our favorite dojo games that made us feel like a couple of waves flowing together. It was the best feeling, a feeling of mutual freedom and exploration. It made us giggle like children.

I will deeply miss Laura’s laugh and her unwavering willingness to stand up for what is right, just, and fair. She taught me it is okay to be courageous and persistent when it concerns ethical humanity in the dojo environment, especially in terms of the treatment of women, LGBTQ+ folks, and people of color. She was a humble pioneer in the global aikido community, paving the way for women to feel safe and vocal against inequities. Laura also deliberately made space for slow, graceful, and subtle — yet heavy and full — modalities not always available or focused on in our art. In our Saturday class Clebert said that he is inspired by Laura’s emphasis on connection, and I too think that connection was something she held dear, not just on the mats but when engaging with people in general. 

Laura was also always profoundly forgiving and always offered opportunities for people to be accountable and correct their wrongdoings, usually multiple times! Witnessing her fierce yet forgiving nature helped me be more open to offering resolutions when conflict has occurred here and in my personal life. Knowing Laura has made me braver and more kindhearted.

Even on my bad days, I felt connected to Laura. She was always authentic, genuine, and present with me. She accepted me where I was at, no matter what, even when I was grumpy. She helped me advocate for myself, sometimes to myself to allow space for rest and recuperation without guilt. And she always made me feel welcome and supported. I vow to do the same for others. 

One of my favorite aikido lessons from Laura was her saying, “Be like a flower and reach toward the sun.” She would ask us to get rooted into the mats, move like petals and leaves in the breeze, and keep our spines stretched skyward. Although this is a beautifully poetic way to share basic aikido principles, it is also a profound life philosophy. So, I ask that we all take Laura’s advice to grow and be strong yet gentle like a flower and make space for the flow of life, love, and light as we all reach toward the sun that glows bright like her soul in all of our hearts.